is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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