just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize