How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Randomize
