fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
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