he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
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