Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
