I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
