sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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