dude i'm inner monologue high
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
