you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
