Kiss
Puke
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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