he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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