So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
