Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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