Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
why do cheetos always look like penises
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
did you just send me my own nude
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
