If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
