I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
