But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
