You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
they need to just BURY HIM!
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize