I cockslap morals
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
They have beer where we have blood.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize