I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
