i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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