My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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