he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Randomize
