Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
