Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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