Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm always down for nudity.
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