Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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