i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You were trust falling into bushes
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
