omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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