I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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