Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
