just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
