my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
