Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
