one might say we're banned from that church
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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