omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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