My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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