is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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