paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
