i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Randomize
