you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
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