somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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