So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
