How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
