there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize