He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
