chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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