Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
