there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
